Well, oi'm raisin' a pint with me boys at the pub

When McGinty storms in 'n' he glares,

"Now where's the spalpeen who poured glue in me tub?!

Point 'im out 'n' I'll kick him downstairs!"

Then up jumps Macafferty, him who's no more

than a shadow that's thrown by a shrub,

and he yells, "Oi am the boyo who did it 'n' sure

'n' be off 'fore I show ye me club!"

Well, we all know Macafferty's more than three sheets

to the wind as the old seamen say

and he's no more a match for McGinty who beats

the bejesus out all in his way.

So the bout lasts a minute or maybe it's two

'fore Macafferty's out like a light.

And we pick up the drunkard who hasn't a clue

as to when, where or how was the fight.

he downs one more pint and he struggles to rise

and he loudly declares to us all,

"Did ye see how meself it 'twas blackened the eyes

of McGinty who's three toimes as tall?!

Oi'm king o' the warriors! Give all a glass!"

Sure 'n' then he collapsed in a heap,

but we drank the free round to the poor bloody ass

and left him there blissful asleep.

The moral?

It isn't the size of the man who wins glory,

It's the pints in the boyo who tells ye the story.